Why the answer varies
The practice of Hindu rituals is not centralized, as interpretations from Dharmashastra, regional customs, family lineage, and priestly traditions may vary, resulting in diverse outcomes.
This indicates that sweeping internet declarations, such as "women are incapable" or "there are no limitations," overly simplify a intricate past.
Family responsibility in real life
Modern families may consist solely of daughters, span across different countries, or have a daughter who takes on a more direct caregiving role for the deceased compared to distant male relatives, prompting a reevaluation of traditional beliefs within many households.
The ethical dilemma arises: who is capable of bearing remembrance with sincerity and accountability?
How to navigate disagreement
If your family values formal ritual correctness, seek guidance from a knowledgeable priest within your tradition to understand the reasoning behind the practices, rather than simply following a strict rule.
When family members have differing opinions, it's best to prevent ancestral ceremonies from becoming a source of tension that disrespects the bonds being commemorated.
A broader principle
Shraddh focuses on the importance of gratitude, honoring one's lineage, and fulfilling one's duty. Families can uphold these principles while recognizing the evolving nature of social roles.
An honorable attitude allows space for tradition, interpreting texts, and acknowledging the current presence of those honoring their ancestors.